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Last year I turned the big 3.0 and got married - I thought that was my milestone year. As it turns out, 2009 quickly overshadowed 2008 when my husband and I found out we were pregnant. I'm going to be experiencing everything for the first time as a woman and an expectant mother which is why I'm calling this my year of firsts. I'm senior editor for Marie Claire South Africa.

Thursday, April 30, 2009

The things people say...

My LO is the size of a large aubergine.

Bit on another more pressing topic: When I was recounting to my sister and a few colleagues about the insensitive things people have been saying to me, they laughed - incredulous. Lori, who had a baby about a year ago shook her head knowingly. I guess you get over it, but it's a really sensitive time. When I had to cancel a dinner arrangement two hours before it was due to take place with our friends Karin and Karl, I almost burst into tears. Karin was just too sweet and understanding. People who know me know it takes a lot to move me to tears. Lately, I have to bite them back at times...

So when I came across this site after someone said to me, 'Shame, you seem to be growing sideways rather than this way,' she said motioning with her hands and smiling all the while, I smiled to myself with arched eyebrows. I honestly don't think people are that aware how much it hurts at the time... but it's really like saying to someone who's not pregnant: 'Wow! you've out on sooo much weight since the last time I saw you'. for the record, no pregnant mother wants to be told their baby is going to be big by the looks of things or how big their nose has grown or how chubby and round their face looks or being told they're glowing only after you've revealed to them that you're pregnant. It's plain insincere! 

I'll try not to take such insensitive comments too seriously in future and think of this when next I feel teary.

* A woman at the pool said, 'You must be having a girl — they say that girl babies steal their mother's beauty.'
* A week before I gave birth to my first baby, these two snooty women walked up to me and asked me to my face, 'Why aren't you wearing maternity clothes? Do you not believe in them?' And then they walked off laughing at me. I was wearing maternity clothes! They had just stopped fitting at that point!


  1. hahahahhahhaahah, that last one is hilarious. Freak. Listening to you pregnant people talk about this staff is really depressing. Worse that first trimester seems to be quite the BEEG test. A friend of mine's been bedridden for three weeks. Pregnant people shouldn't be allowed to talk about being pregnant...or have blogs...you are freaking me out.

  2. shiit, that wasn't insensitive was it. I'm sowwry. Truly. Mwaa

  3. Eish! We need to vent somewhere - but shame, some women have it harder than others so sometimes I feel guilty for complaining... and then I think naaahh!! Everyone has their own cross to bear.